i see butterflies with pistols

today. some randomness.

everytime i hear ocean ridge, everything came back vividly to me. like i remembered the smell of the shower foam i used in perak, how the walls looked like, how all the winds polished their instruments the night before the competition, how bored we were doing sectional practice the whole day not knowing what else to do in those empty hot classes. weird. those are the things you just dont purposely stick to your mind. but i guess it kinda stuck. this is the kinda thing music does to me. and smell too.

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i have the utmost respect for people who are really really really good at writing. they have this.. um.. i guess essence of them. you dont have to really pay attention to what they really are saying, you are just being led. by the words, the phrases, the whole expression and straight away get the whole picture. the best part is - you feel like you know them but not in the superficial kinda way. in fact, you dont know anything about them, because youve never actually meet the eye. its just.. exhilarating.

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i dont get whats the hype over muslims not eating pork. got this friend, always makes jokes around muslims friends who are just about to eat something. and he would go like, 'eh ada babi.' ya know, the past two years, i just let these kinda people get away with a laugh. nothing more and nothing less. but guess what? its getting old, okay?? its not funny anymore. and i threw that to his face.

it didnt stop there. they would just love to rub it into our face. like questioning us, 'why are you guys discriminating against babi anyways?' , 'what if youre not a muslim, you mustve eaten pork already by now. its like, your religion is controlling you.' and the part that pissed me off the most - 'muslims terrorists laa.'

omg. omfg. i know this is gonna sound like a friggin cliche, but seriously, go and educate yourself. we dont eat bacon because there are tapeworms - unkillable. they breed leaving their extremely small mobile larvae going through your blood veins up to your brain. after theyre dead up in your brain and your immune system starts to attack them haa baru kau rasa sawan babi padan muka. plus pigs' flesh absorbs toxin like sponge and therefore even nastier than our own piss. the fact that pigs dont exercise, dont sweat - thus limited output of toxin - eww. seriesly. you guys devour THAT?? i mean, after all that education, trust me you dont want to go ignorant.

its like questioning a vegie why does he go against meat. insulting a hindu not eating beef. a quarter of world population is muslim. why just muslim? jews dont eat pork. i didnt hear you making noise about them. oh i know - it has never occur to you that almost half of the world population doesnt eat pork, because YOU are very shallow. piece of advice, dude, open your eyes, then only open your big mouth.

oh and the terrorism. seriously. you lived all your life in malaysia - in a majority muslim society. come on, have i ever left a bomb in your mother's backyard because youre not a muslim? please. you let CNN feed your mind??

and the thing that got me laughing. he said melayu are racists. if he would go to the states, he'll have whatever rights he should as a human being, unlike malaysian govt. oh please - id love to see you go to the states and live your american dream. but trust me - people will still discriminate you, because youre a freaking asian. the only place you will feel at home is when you go back to your china town. or singapore.

i live with the fact that im muslim. and i know people will never stop passing judgments or even discriminate. with me wearing hijabs and stuff. anywhere i go, whatever i do, people will still judge you for being who you are. deal with the fact. like me. at least i know where i stand.

okay. im not racist. and im not trying to be defensive. but whos pushing the buttons??